fight to the end

2006-07-23T02:35:00.000+08:00

不知道我打的这些字会不会有人看，但没关系，这不重要．我高兴就好．

漫漫长假，不知如何度过．．
好啦！还不致于如此啦！都不知不觉地过了近乎一个月了．不要问我是怎么过的．我就是有办法．．哈哈．．

偶尔跟朋友碰面－真不错，都将近一年没见了，还可以滔滔不绝地聊个没完．．
偶尔发呆，顺便思考一些事情．．具体是什么事情呢？说不上来，虽然这些事情占据了我好多时间
偶尔看看书－我自己认为很有建设性的事（虽然也不尽然啦）
再来，就是浪费时间．．我是嫌时间太多，所以在挥霍，还是怎样？！我知道我迟早会后悔，可是我就是那种不知悔改的人．．

其实还有很多东西想写的．．但一时之间又突然不想写了．．所以算了．．改次再写就是了．．那会是什么时候呢？我还真说不上来．．＝Ｐ

2005-10-02T19:41:00.000+08:00

errr.. well.. i am guilty of not updating often. ok i haven been updating at all.

but cant blame mah.. i cant access to my own blog.. so naturally wun think of updating ah..

its my one week hols nw. china national day. shall do some constructive stuffs lah.. like reading ah.. yeap.. quite into reading recently. but my reading speed is too slow lah.. so shall make use of this hols to finish some books.

i took up kendo. went for a few trainings. ok lah. prefer judo. just wanted to take up a sport for cca. got seniors in there and overall not too bad so join loh.. trainings quite slack.. maybe i should just call them practices. no physical trainings.. practise the strokes and maybe abit of sparring. of cos as a beginner, i am stucked with the footwork and gonna be stucked with that for quite some time lah before any progress..

a junior will be teaching me guitar. yea.. something i hope to accomplish before my graduation

classes are ok. more positive attitude towards schooling. even though this place(the school) brings so much disappointment. i am happy enjoying the life here, meeting all these ppl and stuffs. its the school that spoils everything. the system, the administration and all.. shant get into details here cos i cant stop. hahaa

i have got a russian roomie. (this should be smthg new) haha.. bo2 shi4 sheng1.. power ah.. haha.. quite a nice person. basically we hardly interfere with each other's life so ok lah.. quite good.. hehe

gotta rush off le.. post again nxt time.. but dun count on it lah..

ps. dun leave msgs on tagboard ah.. cos i cant read them anw.. hahaa

woohoo!!!!

2005-08-27T20:40:00.000+08:00

writing tis last post.. in singapore.

feeling abit.. dunno how to desribe such a feeling. always felt like that when i have to board the plane back to bj. abit lost.. abit excited.. abit sad.. mixed emotions.. hahaha..

anw.. guess i didnt mention this the other time.. hmm really appreciate you all for making an effort to meet up eh.. as in.. i know u all are busy with your own stuffs.. gladly we still managed to meet up. hehe.. THANKS!!! hahaha.. kinda dun suit my character to say such stuffs huh.. starting to have goosebumps? want to puke?? haha

enjoyed the trip back to chung cheng ystday. quite alot to say ah.. but dunno how to put them in words at this point of time..

actually ah.. got alot more gan ren fei fu de hua can say de. but kinda tired now.. so.. (dun say le lah.. haha.. wanted to say leave it for next time but ah.. dun tink will remember what i want to say loh.. so suan le!)

take care ppl!!! keep in contact!! we will meet a yr later.. haha.. dun miss me.. keke..*pukes* anw its oni a yr.. very fast de lah.. i will be back before u all noe it. dun change too much ah.. till i cant recognise.. hehehe...

i will update here often.. if i rem to.. =)))))

2005-08-19T16:45:00.000+08:00

made a trip to nus yesterday. v far leh. the ride there is so boring.

stayed in there for barely 30mins. seen the law fac and the biz canteen. yea.. thats all. cos my friend is surprisingly on time. he drove us to holland v.

went to holland v for the first time in my whole life. gosh. i sound very swa gu. fine.. not my fault!! hahaa...

i dont seem to dread nus that much after yesterday. seeing the people in there, thought they behave more like uni students. not say uni students got what type of look ah, but.. thought so only.. very different from all those in bj. seeing clusters of people gathering at the benches, amphitheatre etc.. somehow i feel envious. cos dun seem to have such places in pku. still able to talk crap all the same. it just feels different lah. i miss sec sch and jc life? maybe?.. not sure who can understand this feeling. i cant understand it myself. why should i even feel this way?

seeing familiar faces in the campus makes me happy. yet i would rather those acquaintances not notice me in the crowd. cos i simply cant be bothered to chup them. strange huh.. =(

2005-08-18T00:17:00.000+08:00

guilty of not blogging for a long long long time. so here i am..

forgot alot of details le. so see how much i can remember loh.

coming back to singapore for e 2nd time.. didnt mean much initially. jus.. "yea i am back again." so much things i planned to do( i already forgotten what those plans were) so aint doing much other than meeting up with frens, ABIT of reading and playing.

most meaningful national day ever... though i still didnt watch the entire ndp show. just whats wrong with me? can never sit through throughout the whole show.. watch tv nia mah.. whats so difficult? hahaha

"discovered" that the workload in local unis seems much more heavier than what i have.. at least it seems so ah. now i know why people are so busy.. why they think i am leading a good life over there.. hmm maybe its true.. maybe its not? dunno.. never exactly experienced what each other is experiencing so cannot judge right? all i can say is.. we are going through different education systems. moreover, its still your expectations for ownself that affects your uni life.. guess i should start to raise my expectations? too slack liaoz..

about a week plus to go before i board the plane again. i actually still feel sad just by the thought of it. how strange.. life has been too good back here huh.. dunno.. can't explain. i am aware that things will work out just fine when that day arrives.

was just thinking.. did i accomplish what i intended to? wanted to do so many things but didnt seem like i have done much.

new school term starts. not excited at all. still the same old class people. still the same OLD lok cok classrooms. just different modules. dunno. ever since i moved into hostel, nothing in school fascinates me. probably because i stay in school, so kinda sianz ah..or maybe its just the place. boring campus. fortunately, with good friends around, makes life better ..

wanna lead a more fulfilling campus life eh.. find other things to keep me occupied, other than playing and slacking.. hmm like joining a cca, learn some things or what lah. thought should not be wasting my time there lah. 3 more yrs to go. if i continue the lifestyle i led for the past one yr, i bet i still will be able to slack my 3 yrs away loh. this shouldnt go on lah. life can be more enriching, more meaningful i guess.. alot of things can be done lah. its all up to ownself.

hopefully, i will gain some things when i graduate lah.
wonder why am i saying all these? just don't want to hold any regrets when i ever look back. =)

still got alot of stuffs to blog on. next time lah..

2005-07-25T14:56:00.000+08:00

haven't blogged for ages. well.. i lost access to blogspot again. but this aint the reason for not blogging. just an excuse. plain lazy to blog.

havent been up to anythg too exciting. sending ppl back to singapore one by one. each time can sense a tinge of sadness. dont understand why too. not like as if i am not going back. not like as if i wont be seeing them for a long long time. not like as if i will be stucked here. ya loh. how strange can one get?

jus booked my air tix. be in singapore this weekend. anyone wanna join me for breakfast? haha.. how about chwee kueh at bedok? ehh.. bedok ppl respond! hahha.. just kidding. i better make sure i can travel light enough to take the mrt myself. haha.. once again i yearn to take the mrt leh. BUT.. wait till i pack.. hahaha.. this time must really TRY to take mrt ah.. hehe..

so ppl.. wo (hui) lai ye!! heh~

2005-07-05T19:02:00.000+08:00

should be booking my air tix soon. abit excited. lol.. anyway, first time boarding the plane myself. cool. hehe..

slacked.. as per normal. no classes today.

results for this sem all out liaoz. gpa dropped, as expected. but still kept alive(amazingly). work harder next time loh. sigh. =(

.................

2005-07-02T23:57:00.000+08:00

i didnt fail my history. its a miracle. grades not too bad. really thankful to the teacher for not failing me.

suddenly, i look at my grades. i actually felt no sense of satisfaction at all. one thing is probably i didnt score well enough to feel this way. another thing is i haven't put in my best efforts in the preparation of exams?! i dont know.. i guess i did force myself to work harder at the last minute. is it enough? last sem, results not too bad(given the amt of efforts i bothered to put in). so i count myself lucky to get such grades. this sem, i got no idea what i have been doing. keeps telling myself to work harder but yet.. still last minute work as usual. its just me huh..

i don't understand why i cant feel any sense of achievement at all.. as compared to jc days?! when i managed to pass econs, managed to do well for physical geog paper, managed to score for lep.. i feel happy. but now.. not really. why is it so? i cant understand.

grades dont matter that much? everyone tells me the same thing: gpa is not that impt. i tried to convince myself so. still.. i am bothered by the fact that my gpa is plunging. so i still care about my grades. afterall, i need to reassure my parents with my grades( but not this time round ba. it will only cause some unnecessary worry haha)

i cant understand whats wrong with me.

these few days, most of my friends who were going back home have already went back. left with a few friends here. somehow, i have got more time spent alone. and strangely, i am actually enjoying it. i will rather no one calls, no one smses. i will rather not meet anyone i know when i am outside, meaning i will rather not know anyone at all. just want to do my own stuffs alone. the other day, a friend said.. it must be pretty boring for me here. i said not really. i am pretty much enjoying it actually.

i think i am just kinda weird. haha..

anyway, i can stand not talking so no big deal about not talking lah.

don't know what i am talking le lah. anyway shall go borrow some guide book from friend. go tour around bj. should try to find out more about bj lah since i still have another 3 more years here. heh~

2005-06-28T07:35:00.000+08:00

just back from shan xi. went to da tong, tai yuan and ping yao. hmm it was a fine trip. ping yao is an ancient city(hmm do they call it this way in english? gu 3 cheng2).. nice place to retire in. slower pace.. more relaxing.. simpler..(but maybe not, since its so highly dependent on tourism now) still.. aint too bad. should get my parents to visit these places next time.

sometimes, its really good to have caring friends. just a thought.. i dunno.. i came back, noeing that my friend helped me settle my laundry.. then i had to disrupt a friend's sleep because he helped me keep my keys. i didnt bring my hp.. so i came back to read outdated msgs, said wanted to come send us off.. hope we have fun in shan xi.. though we are only leaving for 3-4 days? hahha.. ok.. but nice..

my room in a terrible mess. i want to do something about it but i am not doing anything about it. you get what i mean? anyway.. gotta catch some sleep before i get down to doing anything serious. hahaha..

2005-06-23T16:54:00.000+08:00

it's over.. my exams. hmm finished le. whether i really mean it as "finished" depends on results.

today's paper was really easy. i am rather well-prepared for it. the teacher was kind. think he is trying to help people pass. so nice. i think i can score for this.

results is out for my most dreaded module(all the chinese grammar stuffs). i dunno whoever taking chinese now likes it but i dont. been hating this module since last sem. i suffered for a yr. the suffering will be prolonged till yr 2. oh well.. nearly failed this module for mid-term, 69. 60 is passing grade. so glad to get 83 for overall. nonetheless, this isnt too good lah. should do better since its a compulsory module but i am contented le lah. really. wish i get as lucky as this for my history paper. but i guess not. sigh

for now.. its HOLIDAYS!!! yeah!

heading for da tong tomorrow night. woohoo.. play play play...

suddenly very keen in watching those whatever kang xi or yong zheng serial shows. used to condemn those shows so much. history related. though history paper brings freaking scary memories but.. its always good to watch shows like this, gain more knowledge.

gotta start coming up with a schedule. make good use of the holidays.

anyway its very warm these few days. everyone is complaining about the heat but i feel pretty ok with it leh. seems like there's something wrong with me. btw the highest temp for the past few days shot up to 39 deg c. yet i still feel ok with it? huh.. i dunno why too.. it will only get hotter lah. ok we shall see. a friend from tsing hua said i looked sunburnt. huh.. is it? haha

2005-06-22T16:50:00.000+08:00

i am goin to fail history.. or shd i say i have already failed the paper since i took it yesterday. cant imagine i am failed my compulsory module. never had such a bad feeling after finishing an exam. (ok maybe for a levels econs) but then.. i didnt even think i was that upset at that time. perhaps its because this time round, i did study for it, but ended up forgetting most of the stuffs. apparently, i didnt prepare enough.. alright.. failing this module means i will have to retake since it's a compulsory module. i don't really mind retaking but the thing is i dun want to fail it. now i am thinking, if i am lucky enough to have scored a passing grade, should i consider retaking the paper next year. i don't mind. i think i will want to spend more time studying history. its quite fun reading it afterall.

prepared for the worst

arghh...

fail... die....

now i dont even have the courage to check my results. so scary. ok.. avoiding is not a solution. i am simply being irrational at this point of time. too sianz to think about anything else.

tomorrow is my last paper. that should be ok.. if nothing goes wrong..

think i am still going back afterall. suddenly, i dont know what i am going back for? just for the sake of going back? i dont know.

cant think much now. =(

oh ya.. why must cheating occur in every exam that i take?

2005-06-17T08:37:00.000+08:00

people spent so much time mugging away to get good grades while some others pay to get the same grades.
how can one of the top univeristies allow this to happen? something is terribly wrong with the system here.
for reports, we can never tell if it's the student's work or not. but i am talking about exams here. yes.. can pay people to take exams for you here. just whats wrong with the school huh.. cant they do something about it? or is it already a culture? so should simply let it continue? cant they just have this new regulation, that is to verify the student pass and make sure that the one taking the exams is SUPPOSED TO??!
me and my friend struggled so hard to complete our computer assignment, forcing ourselves to read those chim encoding stuffs,in hope of passing only. but all people have to do is to hand in their assignment punctually, those done by the senior batch. so are we dumb or what? integrity...
who cares so much about this word here?
yesterday, i can see people cheating during exams. and the teacher was like browsing through the students' scripts? eh.. if you are the invigilator, pls do your job as the invigilator lah! somemore it's so obvious that that guy is cheating loh. he is sitting right in front of the invigilator. damned.
there's nothing we can do unless the school does something about it. do they have so much faith in their students that they think there's no need to change the system?! insane! surely we will keep to our integrity and not resort to such despicable means. and feel so helpless when we can do nothing to put a stop to all these nonsense. in the end, we only can turn to one another to complain. sad huh.. ok this is life here. it's so unfair.. so ridiculous..
back to my books. i still have to study because i am not paying people to take my exams for me.

2005-06-14T15:14:00.000+08:00

i can't access to blogspot again. can still update lah.

i can't remember all those history stuffs. just when i thought i managed to link things together.. later in the day, when i see the term again. . i can't remember much. all i can say is what i remember wont be enough to crap through the paper. good luck to me.

16th first paper. computer theory. visual basic. for those who don't know whats visual basic, nvm. i still don't know much even now. argh.. i need to smoke through the exam. i don't want to fail! i don't want retake and suffer this all over again.

back to history. actually chinese history is interesting to read, if only i don't have to prepare for exams.. i think i will enjoy it more.. =)

2005-06-13T04:10:00.000+08:00

didnt i mention that i won't be bloggin much for the following 2 weeks? so what am i doing now? heh~

should be sleeping soon i guess. been sleeping at such times for the past few days. ok i quite enjoy it anyway. i do enjoy preparing for exams in some sense. because this is the only time i feel that i am a student. always thought that you get to learn alot of new stuffs during revisions(simply because i hardly pay attention in class, thus not knowing what exactly went on)

been spending most of my time in the study area for the past few days. having to put up with the heat and lack of ventilation in there. whatever it is, i hope my hard work pays off. ok maybe i didnt study as hard as i may sound BUT at least i tried to. why am i saying all these? because i have a bad feeling for the exams this time round. how bad? worried. i don't want to fail any module because i don't want to retake any of the modules. i don't want my gpa to drop!

sianz. but studying is still fun lar. =P

2005-06-11T21:30:00.000+08:00

thought of writing an entry since shouldnt be updating any time soon. cos exams starts next week. not that i won't have the time to come online, there's always time to slack afterall. just that i dont think i will be in any mood to write anything. hahaha

spent some time alone(textbooks not counted) for the whole afternoon. and been thinking about the same old stuffs. time sure flies....

earlier on, a senior was saying how he slacked through his jc life, hmm he was sleeping throughout lah. ok i slacked through too. woo... 2 yrs spent on slacking. i enjoyed my jc days all the same. heh~

now that i am here, i slacked away my 1st semester. fun but not too fun too. i am supposed to be a hardworking eh(had to uphold a good sporean student's image here) beginning of this semester, i INTENDED to work harder.. note: i mean "intended" so apparently i haven't. sad case.

now end term exams is next week. after that, it marks the end of the semester. wah fast. i thought i JUST came back from singapore?! i dont miss home at all.

it's summer now. before i know it, it will be freezing cold here again.

总觉得很多东西都来不及去完成。。就连开始都懒得去做。。时间就已经流逝。。到时就会说：“假如当初。。。”怎么怎么样。。。

so many things i want to do, but have been delaying all these plans due to certain reasons(be it valid or simply excuses)..

it's time to come up with a list of things to do and make sure i accomplish them. heh~
that will be after exams lah.(is this a valid reason ?) haha

discovered something last night. the few of us were talking to this taiwanese friend. my friend asked what's the meaning of"机车"? ok. interesting. been hearing this term being used frequently on taiwanese variety shows. roughly know the meaning but not the exact one though. so .. good chance to hear the explanation from a local then. its was then that we got to know that actually it is another term for this particular vulgarity(ok i shan't type it here. but its hokkien vulgarity lah). i went like.. huh.. it meant that ah? all along i though it was quite an interesting term leh.. abit funny in fact.. oohh.. wow.. something new learnt. but i think still won't exactly get into trouble for using this word in taiwan ba? since we hear it so often on variety shows?!

2005-06-09T17:20:00.000+08:00

of late, there's this friendship problem. i wasnt exactly involved.

somehow discovered the true colours of a close korean friend. she been talking bad about another close friend. they are both koreans by the way. we are all good friends. didnt expect things to turn out this way.

today got to hear some even more devastating news. which is this friend, she been telling the rest of our korean classmates certain "secrets" of us (singaporeans). basically we treat her as a close friend so we share alot of things with her. that includes our internal jokes and whatsoever. to think she told the other koreans about it. not say those are secrets that no one should know but those arent things that should be said to anyone else loh. as what my friend describes it to be.. felt betrayed. somemore this korean friend also tells the others that singaporeans are very stingy when we go on trips. we don't splurge like how the koreans does, sometimes we do hope to save abit and spend on other areas more worthwhile spending on. so does that makes us stingy? just because we don't spend the money the way you intended to ? worse is she always appeared so accomodating during those trips. anything is fine. everything is ok. then when you return from trips, you go around telling people how stingy we were. thanks. i appreciate that..

conclusion is.. she is not who she appears to be. what we see is the surface, we don't get to see her true colours. somehow angry because we treated her as a good friend yet this is how she treated us. and heard she has been doing some things behind some people's backs. i cant really go into details here. all i know is the korean clique in my class is so complicated. so much politics is going on.

then again, i heard all these from another friend(who was the victim lah), i dunno how much i should believe. if all these were true, i feel sad for all those people who were deceived by her and are still kept in the dark. she is simply too good in hiding her true colours. we treated her as a close friend yet this is all she can do to us?

i don't exactly feel hurt or what. just angry for all those people whom she is hurting now. and i wonder (now upon knowing the truth) how should i face her? pretend that nothing happened, be as hypocrtical as her? 3 more years down the road. of course many things can change. at least for now, i can't visualise any changes as yet.

apparently, i hope all these nonsense she is creating will stop right here. if not, i don't see why i should be keeping quiet when she is hurting my friends. it's was already annoying enough to know that she is hurting my kroean friend. now my singaporean friends(who treated her as a good friend) are into the picture too. just what is she trying to do?

don't test my patience. i will make sure i confront her if she continues all these nonsense. insane!

can't understand why she is doing all these when people are already starting to dislike her. she should also realise some people are drifting away from her.

shall wait and see. she has to learn her lesson some day. see what she can do to us

so glad that this isn't happening among singaporeans

2005-06-08T23:05:00.000+08:00

access to blogspot once again. wah.. cool.. when will it be gone? haha

got a report to do. eh.. 2000 words i tink. then again, tink dun have word limit. but i feel that at least shd write 2000 words ba. yesh.. and i havent even written a single word. its due tml. good luck to me. no slp. hehe..

after my submitting my report, shall have to get down to studying for exams. as what my fren calls it, in retreat(bi4 guan1). i dun really tink i can do that successfully since i haven tried it b4. i just do whatever i can lah. afterall, the following 2 weeks are crucial to me. i hope i "pull through". surviving these 2 weeks not enough lah, results(hopefully) can make it lah. =(

i am still quite bothered about.. if i should go home this time round. anw now change of plans. my frens going jiang nan, shanghai, su zhou area. ok.. these are places that i am KEEN on going, i am more interested in these places lah. SO.. that makes decision-making even more difficult. grrR.. he nan trip postponed to next winter break. so if i going for that, i wun be goin home next jan. SO does it mean i should go home this time round? sianz.. i cant make up my mind.

travelling aside.. exams comes first. heheh..

hmm think gonna give our frens a bdae surprise later. at 12midnite. hahaha..

err..... report comes first.. arghh

2005-06-03T16:49:00.000+08:00

i am happy today bcos i had an enjoyable history lesson. and i really tink my history teacher is good. (jus that i dun appreciate much in the past) for once, i am actually glad that i came here to study. for once i believed that i made the right choice. seriously i wonder if i should be happy or sad? haha. so what have i been doing for the past sem? wasting my time slacking? hahaha... but the teacher said some stuffs that enlightened me, somehow managed to change the way i view history. can see history from a different perspective. makes me realise that all along, my so-called opinions are all created by the media. we think what they want us to think. what we call propaganda.. many issues, when we bother to think in depth, we can come up with a totally different perception. i just thought that i didnt exactly bother to think much about a lot of matters cos i am simply too willing to accept whats presented in front of me. its only when i stepped out of spore, i realised how much i am missing out outside here.

it is really interesting thinking through such stuffs. i dun know if u all can understand what i mean. i dun exactly know what i am typing too. at least i am clear of what i feel lah, just that its too difficult to be put into words.

yeah..i am amazed by some stuffs my teacher said. maybe simply cos i cant imagine hearing a local give such opinions. i thought all of them are the same, when it comes to political stands. apparently, i was wrong.

i am beginning to cherish the chance to study here.

BUT.. alamak.. very hot siaz.. scorching hot.. sianz.. its hot and dry.. argh

2005-05-17T00:27:00.000+08:00

amazingly i can update. i cant access to blogspot AGAIN. so cant read u ppl's blog but can update so aint too bad huh.

wu yue tian was in bj. haha how cool is that. accompanied a friend to town area cos wu yue tian was having some autograph session there. went for fun lah. din get to see them. got to see stone up close. anw it was really funny about how i got to see stone lah. overall not much disappointment cos wasnt expecting much from it in the first place. was impressed by the fans though. really die-hard fans arh. not easy to be a fan leh.. hahaa.. seeing those things they did.. hmm i think i will be contented to show my support by purchasing their original albums and probably(if poss) buy tickets to watch their concert. those "chase-star" stuffs are too tiring. ahhaha

first time i went out with this fren. nus law (yr3)exchange student. then i found out that she's frm the same pri sch as i was. and we sort of shared some common childhood memories since we grew up in the same area. thomson plaza.. used to have yaohan.. then the "fish waffle" hahaa.. her bro is the same age as us, was in the class jus next to mine. but i dunno him lah. still.. interesting enough.

oh ya.. had my 1st cup of starbucks mocha frappucino too. sounds like i am from some village huh. like wats the big deal? but realy she bu de drink starbucks loh.. seems expensive but actuali is the same as in sg. aiya.. its like that 1 lah. korean fren was so excited when she drank starbucks coffee the other time. back in korea, it simply too common. we change to adapt the environment. or rather, the environment changes us.

kinda motivated to study once again. maybe bcos i am starting to have some bad feeling? that i am goin to fail? ok time to buck up! i better dun fail manz...

jus now, my bro told me a guy called my hp(in sg lah). ok.. assumingly he's my fren. makes me wonder who's that. he doesnt know that i came bj. so i guess he's some1 i dun really keep in contact with? do i even know him at all. anw i though it was quite funny lah. hahaha

it rained today. how nice. i love rainy days..weather not too hot yet. good for us.

2005-05-07T13:55:00.000+08:00

last thing i shd think about doing now is playing mahjong.

been playing mahjong for 4 nights le.(cant let parents know about this. shhsshh) ok i didnt play much last night but still...... this is how duo luo i can get. but i believe i can get even more duo luo than this. sianz. how?

my friend is here for her exams. so is my milo and tau sa pia. hehe nice.

its weekend. the week is going to end. arghh... i need to study. i seem to be saying the same thing in all my entries. goes to show how much i have studied huh.. barely started. grrr... i cant be a nerd.

my friend intro me a site to dl alot of shows, inclusive of movies, variety shows(wan yu, wo cai etc). wahh... how can i even study like that?? i think i can just continue to duo luo. hrmphhh..

study.. study ... study...

sianz

2005-05-04T18:14:00.000+08:00

a cab driver thought i am a thai?! strange. do i even look like one? was mistaken as a jap once.. by a japanese o-jisan. he came up to ask me some qn(cant rem what) then i answered. then he asked"are you a japanese?" in jap. ok.. i ever learnt abit of jap b4 so i could understd that qn. haha.. er.. no i am not. was mistaken as a korean b4 too, but thats most probably bcos i am with a group of korean friends. whatever it is, no one will know that you are a singaporean by your appearance. singaporeans dont really have any sporean look huh.. haha BUT over here, we concluded that the BEST way to tell if someone is a sporean is by how he/she speaks. SINGLISH lah. u hear all the "lah" loh" "leh""meh" hahaha.. and singlish kinda brings us closer. we are happy just using it or hearing it.

suddenly i think my hols gonna end soon. sianz. i need to study. but it was mahjong last nite. tonite is more play and fun. tml my fren is coming over. will be bringing her ard. so when is it time to study? hmm..

2005-05-02T20:13:00.000+08:00

cleaned up my room last nite. i am always in the mood to do such bo liao stuffs when i have tonnes of time.

i need to study. alot of things to catch up on. chinese history. tcher quite good to me, though i kept ponning half of his lessons(i turn up for the 2nd period most of the time). think i lagging to far behind for history. i better do something about it. other than that, i hope i do well for my that mid-term exam. if can do well, i feel more confident of scoring for this module lah. gu wen should be ok as long as i study. hehe so no prob for that. of cos cannot diao yi qing xin.

still watching that hk serial. watching ba li lian ren(korean serial) for a 2nd time. hahaa.. still got some other dvds to watch.. sure can keep me occupied. hehe

should jio people go play bowling or mahjong. went tsing hua for bowling the other night. yesh they have got their own bowling alley. how cool that is(at first thought). but after seeing the size of it, actually nothing too fantastic too. quite small. think 8 or 10 lanes only. they tried too hard to make space lah so each lane is shorter and narrower than usual. very sianz. somemore so ex. in the end only played one game. not fun.

no one is too keen on bowling other than myself. how sad.. ....mahjong is too duo luo! hahaa..

aiya i should just go study and be a nerd. but how to be one?? hahaha

2005-05-01T07:28:00.000+08:00

i think i should be able to focus while writing this entry. no one to chat on msn mah. haha

hmm spent the day doing nothing so far. been watching vcd lah. some hong kong serial my friend lent me b4 she left for wuhan. haha. thats to keep me entertained.

on the night i was preparing for my exam, i flipped through my this small photo album. yeah.. then saw those photos we all took at the airport last yr(on the night i left for bj) i also saw the photo i took with my parents and brother. hmm.. suddenly i miss home. people tend to get more emotional late at night. for my case, i can think better at night. ehh.. ya loh.. i miss singapore.. somehow its just some surge of emotions. missing home is one thing but i wasnt exactly thinking of flying back home. its just some feeling i guess.

on several occasions, i ever asked myself what would my life be like if i havent came over here. ok i think i will most likely be in nus. would it be better? of cos there is no answer to all these questions lah. i dont think i regret coming over here.. not say life here is a better choice or what. i cant say which is better cos i haven been able to experience nus life. no regrets as in life aint too bad over here?! there are many things that i think i can do better. like what leh.. things like study harder.. buy more books and more imptly READ THEM and not just put them on display etc etc.. i even asked myself what will it be like if i havent chose zhong wen xi in the first place. not that i am regretting lah. just that why was i so stubborn on taking chinese? did i really have such keen interest in it? if yes, then why am i in zhong wen xi, yet i dont appear too enthu about anything at all? so what is it that i am really keen on?

shall have to continue on this entry later on.. going out.. aiya.. i was in the right mood to write. grr

2005-05-01T02:32:00.000+08:00

alright. back to continue the previous entry.

back to life over in bj. most things are fine. maybe there are certain things that i dun like but still able to cope with all these differences. afterall, i keep reminding myself, i would have to put up with all these for another 3plus years or even more( if i may want to continue my studies, its all depends). so not liking somethgs is one thing but when you havent got a choice, then just put up with it(while continue complaining at the same time)!

there are some stuffs in sch that disappoint me. not that i expected alot in the first place that caused such disappointment. i came in without much(or any ) expectations. not too bothered to think about such things. but i thought some things can be improved for sure, that is if anyone is bothered to care. cheating in exams shouldnt be allowed. why should someone deserve high marks without putting in ANY efforts? i am not particularly hardworking nor do i spend all my time and efforts on writing reports/studying for exams. at least i tried(though not the best i could) but still.. i tried. but why is it that those who do nothing can score for their modules? thats so unfair. ok. nothing is fair. i came to realise that getting good grades dont mean that you are really capable. you are simply smart, smart enough to resort to other means. despise such people. 不劳而获，应感到羞愧，却竟还沾沾自喜。可恨！somehow its makes the uni cert so worthless? not just because many people have one but rather you can get it so easily? all you have to do is do it the "smart" way. how smart can that be?

*to be continued* .. hmm soon.. i hope.
off to watch that hk serial. keke
안녕(byebye)

2005-04-30T16:07:00.000+08:00

exam was ok i hope. dunno how would i fare till i get my results. gd luck to me.

one week hols starts frm today. eh dunno what i will be doing yet. see how. but i really don't want to simply slack the entire holidays away. haha

friends set of to wuhan in the evening. i kinda miss them le. was abit sad seeing them leave. yet i find myself being quite ridiculous for feeling this way. they are just goin away for about a week mah. strange.

celebrated friend's birthday. i learnt how to sing korean bdae song. yeah! they have got another version, quite cute leh. akin to our version of"happy birthday to you you are born in the zoo.." really interesting. shall learn that version soon. i want to learn "i believe" korean version also...

i at a loss of what to write again. it always happen to me. think must be because i multi-task-ing when i blog. so i lose concentration, ends up forgetting what i intend to write. ok shall focus next time. so.. its like that for now. haha

2005-04-27T13:59:00.000+08:00

have got a mid-term exam on thurs. kinda worried. haven been keeping up to this module. neither have i been keeping up with my history module. wish me luck then.

haven been doin much, other than sleeping. is it bcos i am sick or am i too tired from sleeping too much? i have got no idea.

right now, only thinking about this thurs' paper. after that, will be play play play. frens' birthday so ktv thru the night. yeah!

there are some things i will want to write on. but not now i think. when i am in more mood to think and also when i have the time to type longer.

got to get back to books. sianz

I can blog in BJ!

2005-04-15T17:07:00.000+08:00

hi ppl. i can finally access to blogspot. yes here in bj. nice. no more firewall. hehei dunno how often i will update though. was very tempted to blog when i read my friends' blogs. they blog with so much.. hmm depth?.. i dunno if thats the exact word i am looking for but u get what i mean lah. busy with reports these few days. haven been working hard enough of it. there's always time to play u see. last nite was mahjong. 2 days ago was carom and *asshole* daidee. ok i didnt reali want to type that word here but thats what they call it mah. oh well. now my room has sort of officially become some game n entertainment centre. because i haven't got a roomie. i dun mind them coming over to play lah. quite funn listening to them talk crap. but it will also mean that i have to play as well. last night, wanted to continue on my report but they want to play mahjong. i don't mind them coming over to play. but at the same time, assumingly, i want to join in the game too. so.. never mind loh. do report later.nothing much to blog on now. not thinking much too. all that comes to mind in reports reports reports. grr... only want to get over and done with it. i can read u ppl's blogs too. so update ur blogs, let me know how you guys are doing ok?will blog more next time.how do i post pictures? never tried that before. haven thought of trying that till now. gunni, can help me modify my blog when you are free? a more colourful one? thanks! hehe

i am finally updating!!

2005-02-16T15:44:00.000+08:00

hmm will be back in beijing soon.. so there goes my access to blogspot lah.. so might as well try post smthg b4 i go bck huh...

actually supposed to have alot to write in here.. but apparently i shall not share hows life over there cos think i would have told much about it plus am too lazy to repeat evrythg again.. hahaha..

to summarise.. i am surviving well over there.. haha.. sounds so fu yan.. keke i noe.. but heck lah..

ok.. think till today i managed to meet up with ppl whom i wan to meet up with.. sadly, cant meet up with shi gong this time round.. will have to wait till nxt hols le loh.. and din get to meet up with some other ppl too.. ok nvm.. nxt time.. anw i will be back soon.. hahah

Shall tok abt how it feels about coming back here for my 1st hols.. It did felt reali strange to be back here for e 1st few days.. as in i thought i oreadi forgotten how to live here le(though tis is a place i call home..).. Bet i will feel awkward when i get back there oso.. hahaha.. all i need is time to get used to it lah...

I dun feel strange seeing shifu, xy, gunni at e airport lah( if i say it felt real weird rite, probably i will get hum tumed?).. ya.. like wat many ppl says, it felt that u haven left at all.. true.. i mean i am back so soon...

Err.. wanna say a BIG BIG THANK YOU to u all for sparing time to meet up with me. Ya lohh.. guesss u ppl are busy in one way or another.. but still got give face ah.. so xie xie ni men!!! actuali got alot to say lah.. but been typing tis since 9 plus.. haha and its 11plus nw.. i din spend 2 hrs typing such short entry.. jus that i was chatting away here n there on msn.. dats why...

I try to update more these 2 days ba... if i happen to rem anythg to say..

Quite a few frens n seniors are bck in beijing le.. Starting to miss them back there le..

But i will miss you ppl when i get back there lah.. guess this is how things supposed to go huh.. =)

2005-01-24T18:06:00.000+08:00

Its time that i type something in here since i wun get to update this blog when i go back there.YEah.. I am back and what's new?! haha..I was thinking what will i be doin if i haven't come back this vacation. Cos it seems that i am missing out alot of fun thats goin on in beijing. Lotsa ktv sessions. And more importantly, the harbin trip that i have been looking forward to!!! Aiya.. But of cos i miss my dear frens in sg too!!! hahaah.. Oh well.. Jus cant have the best of both worlds riteZ?Nice to be able to chat and meet up as like before.. Though less often as compared to last time since everyone is busy with their own stuffs. Well.. At least i am not condemned jus bcos i am away for a few months. Hahah.. Cos luckily i din come back with the beijing accent. hehe...Was so difficult to imagine how life gonna be b4 i went over. Amazingly, my worries are unfounded. Gladly, it was pretty much of a breeze for the past few months. Ok I think i am quite lucky lah. Meeting those ppl whom i met, getting help that i needed and stuffs.. Surely all these made my life there much easier.ERm.. is this some reflecting session or what? hahha...I am talking crap lah.. as usual..

neW bloG f0r me

2004-07-09T05:46:00.000+08:00

i got a new blog le. haiz.. seems lik i have to abandon e one at ujournal.. how sad.. all cos i lost le.. was defeated by the psychoing of gunni and xy..
wat "fight of the century".. boo0000... haha.. tink oni gunni and xy noes wat i am toking about..
anyway, i am not one who can bothers much bout my blog.. so any1 keen on the job can always help me change the outlook.. heheZ.. xie le